Evil Blond Kid

EBK #7: Kiss And Tell

Sat, 11 May 2013 12:20:26 -0700

Episode 7 of the Evil Blond Kid podcast is now available online! Truth be told, I’ve been hesitant to include this story on my podcast series. It’s a regrettable hookup tale that should appeal to your “drunken frat guy” sensibilities, and one that’s awkward enough for me to change names. Sure, a lot of guys have a story like this, but the reason I find mine worth telling is how surreal it seems to me in retrospect, like a chapter torn out of a book about someone else. Certainly a pivotal watermark on my decent into immorality.

While not definitively “explicit,” this episode deals with racier subject matter than usual. I talk about adult things and use adult language. Because I’m an adult.

Listen to the podcast here, subscribe to it on iTunes, and follow me on Twitter:@EvilBlondKid.

Video

Wed, 24 Apr 2013 17:15:14 -0700

New Facebook Page

Wed, 24 Apr 2013 17:14:56 -0700

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EBK #6: Boy Versus Cat

Fri, 19 Apr 2013 13:31:06 -0700

The newest Evil Blond Kid episode is up! It’s a good, action-packed story of man versus beast, and the loss of humanity paid to win the battle. While perhaps not as classic a tale as Moby Dick or as badass as Liam Neeson versus All of the Wolves, I can assure you my story is quite the nail-biter. Cat lovers beware: while I’m sure you’ve stood by me throughout all the horrible things I’ve done to elderly strangers, family members, ex-girlfriends, and God, this may be the straw that breaks the camel’s back. Also, I got a new microphone, so the audio is crazy good. So good, you can hear the kitten souls flying back to heaven. Have I said too much?

Listen to the podcast here, subscribe to it on iTunes, and follow me on Twitter:@EvilBlondKid.

Today’s Evil Blond Kid: arms dealer Owen Davian from...

Fri, 19 Apr 2013 02:02:01 -0700

Today’s Evil Blond Kid: arms dealer Owen Davian from Mission: Impossible 3, played by Philip Seymour Hoffman without any trace of breadstick crumbs on his chin.

EBK #5: An Altar Boy's Secret

Fri, 29 Mar 2013 14:34:16 -0700

Here’s a story of a time the church rubbed me the wrong way — no, not like that. On this Good Friday/Easter weekend, I tell a tale of a sinner-in-saint’s-clothing who tried to cheat his way into heaven, and the system that would have let him get away with it if it weren’t for some good, old-fashioned guilt.

I apologize for any audio issues with this episode. I had a few unfixable mishaps in the editing process but overall it turned out PERFECT SHUT UP.

Listen to the podcast here, subscribe to it on iTunes, and follow me on Twitter: @EvilBlondKid.

Today’s Evil Blond Kid: Rolfe from “The Sound of...

Fri, 29 Mar 2013 01:05:27 -0700

Today’s Evil Blond Kid: Rolfe from “The Sound of Music.” I imagine it must’ve been pretty awkward for Liesl von Trapp to tell her future husband that she had a whole song and dance number with a Nazi.

EBK #4: Fake Online Boyfriend

Thu, 14 Mar 2013 09:37:42 -0700

In this month’s episode, I tell a story of one of the most twisted things I’ve ever done. It’s a story about catfishing — long before today’s era of catfishing — told from the eyes of the catfish himself. I’m excited to release this episode because it’s my favorite one yet — also because I’ve never told it before and the people in the story probably don’t know the truth. Hopefully they never will, because I changed their names. LIES ARE EVIL TOO!

Listen to the podcast here, subscribe to it on iTunes, and follow me on Twitter: @EvilBlondKid.

Today’s Evil Blond Kid is Raoul Silva in Skyfall. So evil...

Thu, 14 Mar 2013 09:02:38 -0700

Today’s Evil Blond Kid is Raoul Silva in Skyfall. So evil even his natural teeth wanted nothing to do with him.

EBK #3: The Tell-Tale Blazer

Tue, 12 Feb 2013 19:57:07 -0800

In this special Valentine’s Day themed episode, I tell a story of high school romance — which I inexcusably sabotaged with lies, rudeness, and kleptomania. I told a version of this story at a live storytelling event in Los Angeles, and I have since updated it with sounds and music to make it more pleasing to your ears. If you don’t find my actions in this story to be sufficiently evil, surely my giddy revival of a tale certain people from my past likely wish to forget is a sin in an of itself.

Listen to the podcast here, or better yet, subscribe and rate on iTunes. And follow me on Twitter: @EvilBlondKid.

EBK #2: The Shooter

Wed, 23 Jan 2013 20:12:35 -0800

I finished the second Evil Blond Kid podcast a few weeks in advance (though I surpassed my 10-minute limit by 1:22). With much of the public discourse these days focusing on gun control, there is a memory that has frequently come to my mind. It’s a story about how I once pointed a gun at a person and pulled the trigger. Either that or taking advantage of current events to tell this story is pretty messed up.

Listen to the podcast here, or subscribe to and rate it on iTunes. If you like it, share it with your friends! And if you don’t like it, I WILL FIND YOU.

Of course you can try to stalk me first on Twitter (@EvilBlondKid), but trust me, you’ll be playing right into my evil hands.

Evil Blond Kid of the Week: Joffrey Baratheon, from HBO’s...

Wed, 23 Jan 2013 17:17:11 -0800

Evil Blond Kid of the Week: Joffrey Baratheon, from HBO’s Game of Thrones, based on George R. R. Martin’s Song of Ice and Fire series.

Now available on iTunes!

Mon, 14 Jan 2013 20:16:56 -0800

You can now subscribe to the Evil Blond Kid podcast on iTunes, which means I will now be able to trigger my subliminal commands while you are driving or listening via mobile devices. You have been warned… but really it’s not like you can do anything about it at this point.

Find me on iTunes by searching for “Evil Blond Kid,” or just by going here.

Evil Blond Kid of the Week: Henry Evans of The Good Son

Mon, 14 Jan 2013 20:06:22 -0800

Evil Blond Kid of the Week: Henry Evans of The Good Son

EBK #1: Cold Call Justice

Fri, 11 Jan 2013 19:21:00 -0800

The very first Evil Blond Kid podcast is up! In “Cold Call Justice,” I tell the story of my short-lived aspirations of being a prosecutor — a dream I realized was based more in fantasy than reality.

Listen to it for free, or download/subscribe on iTunes.

This is the first podcast I have ever recorded on my own, so please bear with me in regards to any tech/audio issues. I’ll get better at this as time goes on.

Thanks, and enjoy!

Photo

Fri, 11 Jan 2013 18:20:11 -0800

Welcome!

Fri, 11 Jan 2013 18:14:28 -0800

Hello there! My name is Erik Voss, and like famous villains Draco Malfoy, Johnny Lawrence, and Joffrey Baratheon, I have a full head of blond hair. Because I can’t tell the difference between causation and correlation, I fear I might also be EVIL. And since you can never really trust those drugstore-bought home morality tests, I created this podcast to help me sort things out.

The Evil Blond Kid podcast will feature a new episode once a month (maybe more often) in which I will tell an anecdote from my life wherein I engaged in some morally questionable behavior. Hopefully with time, I’ll be able to step back and gaze upon my life experiences as an old weaver would reflect upon his stitchwork to decipher if he’s been unknowingly weaving a big swastika scarf. Happens more often than you think.

The episodes will be short — no longer than 10 minutes — and will feature humor and theme music and plot twists… you know, to compensate for my stupid voice. If you like what you hear, share it with friends! Give me feedback! And you can be honest. Any haters who find themselves in my evil death labyrinth should consider their fates a mere correlation.

Thanks for listening!